Fears
by catsandanimenerd
Summary: Enma is a mess on the inside but that's alright with Tsuna
_Enma is invisible._

Tsuna turns to him with a wide grin, wanting to share something-with _Enma,_ and _only_ Enma-as if it's the greatest secret in the world.

(And Enma's heart beats even faster, his stomach turns violently, because Tsuna is looking _at_ him, not _through_ him.)

(Though it _is_ high time that Enma admits that he's fallen so _deeply_ for this reluctant teen Boss.)

"What do you think Enma-kun? Do you want to go to the park with everyone tomorrow?" Tsuna asks, and Enma blinks. Sometimes Tsuna talks but Enma doesn't hear much. In fact, when people talk, sometimes Enma gets lost in between their words, hearing them but not _hearing_ them.

The question slams into the boy roughly and his breath leaves him in a rush. There's a weight in his chest, crushing him. Frantically, he tries to hold himself together. His lips tremble and there's a moistness behind his eyes that he pushes _back_ , unwilling to break down in front of everyone, in front of _Tsuna_.

"Oh, I can't really-really," he says, the smile on his face _too_ wide in his nervousness, "I have to look-look over some-some stuff."

Tsuna's face falls slightly and the weight doubles. Enma quietly chokes on his breath, his heart hammering beneath his breast.

(Enma knows it's not _normal_ but he can't help it. The very _thought_ of spending time in such a large group threatens to smash him apart.)

(And he feels so, so much worse when he realizes that _Tsuna_ -his _wonderful_ , thoughtful friend who never left others out- _wanted_ him there for whatever reason.)

"Aa, that's ok! We can hang out some other time!" Tsuna hurries to reassure. Enma's fake smile falls into a tiny, real one and he relaxes a bit more.

(The weight doesn't _completely_ disappear but it's a little easier for him with Tsuna there.)

* * *

 _Tsuna is the Sky, accepting of all, even the Earth that he cannot touch._

Tsuna notices tiny things about his friends. He knows about Ryohei's talent with cooking. He knows that Hayato tends to fall asleep watching videos about Bigfoot. He knows that Takeshi cries during sports movies, even ones that aren't really even that sad. Kyoya uses his men to rescue stray cats. Mukuro is secretly a fashionista and gives Chrome tips. Kyoko's cooking tends to fluctuate between spicy(mad)and sweet(happy). Haru is starting to somewhat believe Hayato's crazy theories and wants to start her own cult.

He sees _all_ of this, and yet, when it comes down to it, Tsuna is still as oblivious as he always was. Otherwise, he'd know _exactly_ why Enma avoids the Guardians when they gather.

(He admits, privately, that it _hurts_. He wants _all_ of his friends to get along, now that they've settled their differences. But Enma is _still_ staying away from the Vongola, and the Vongola are _still_ keeping their distance from the Shimon.)

"Focus, Dame-Tsuna!" Reborn orders, smacking him over the head. Tsuna weakly protests, the pain dull and far from his occupied mind. Reborn looks at him with those creepily knowledgeable eyes. He shivers and his Intuition is _screaming_ at him.

"Why don't you go ask Enma yourself instead of wondering?"

(Tsuna hates Reborn's mind-reading so, so, _so much_.)

"Reborn! I can't just ask him. That would be-would be….," his protests fall short. Tsuna isn't usually one to butt into others' businesses but this is _Enma_.

(Enma, who is the Earth to his Sky. The same Enma that he fought tooth and nail against in order to _save_ him.)

"You didn't stay silent when he attacked your _famglia_. Why are you hesitating now?" Reborn asks. Tsuna bites his lip and looks away.

(Because his Intuition told him _not_ to look further, _not_ to push the issue.)

(And even though he _hates_ it, his Intuition has seldom been wrong about anything.)

"Enma-kun wants his privacy," Tsuna states firmly, glaring down at Reborn. "And I'm _not_ going to violate that."

* * *

Tsuna's shiny new cell phone rings at two in the morning and Tsuna gropes his bed stand for it. He's tired and bleary eyed but dutifully answers the shrieking device.

" _Tsu-Tsuna-k-kun?_ " Enma's voice, shrill and _breathy_ , says to him. Immediately, he sits up and fiddles with the lamp. Once it's on and his eyes have stopped protesting does he answer.

"What's wrong Enma-kun?" Tsuna's gut is coiling violently, his brain sending signals that something is not right with Enma. Enma whimpers into the phone and Tsuna shakes with worry.

"I-I-I can you-can you come over here?" he practically begs, stumbling over his words.

(Tsuna doesn't remember answering. He doesn't remember roughly swallowing his pills and flying out of his room, doesn't remember the chill of the air on his body.)

Tsuna comes to only when he's tackled. His body tenses, ready for a fight, but his mind registers Enma's familiar mop of red hair and he relaxes.

"Enma-kun?" Enma pulls away slightly and Tsuna's fire burns out.

Enma's cheeks are red and puffy. His eyes are bloodshot and dry, even though there are tears falling steadily from them. His frame is shaking slightly and Tsuna hurries to pull the other boy into his body, trying to protect him from whatever plagues his mind.

"I'm-I'm-I'm sor-sorry Tsun-Tsuna-kun," he immediately apologizes. Tsuna's lip trembles and he shakes his head.

"No, no it's ok Enma-kun! Just tell me what's wrong," he begs, fingers helplessly trying to dig into Enma's skin. Enma keens and buries his face in Tsuna's neck. He breathes out and in. Soon, he's calmed.

"I can't-can't go. To-to the pa-party tomorrow," he confesses in a rush. Tsuna freezes. "I can't-can't handle so many-many _people_." Tsuna stiffly brushes a hand through his hair, fingers massaging Enma's scalp soothingly.

(Everything falls into place. Enma, hiding behind others except when on official Boss business. Enma, stuttering and unable to look others in the eyes. Enma flinching whenever others raised their voice. Enma staying quiet, nearly always around the rowdier Guardians.)

(Tsuna remembers the first time that he turned to Enma to comment to him, remembers _vividly_ how Enma lit up like a Christmas tree and responded in kind.)

"Shh," Tsuna murmurs, arms tightening their grip around Enma. "It's ok Enma-kun. You don't have to go if you don't want to." Enma looks up at him and Tsuna's heart breaks.

"R-Really?" Tsuna nods and the tension in Enma's body is released so suddenly that Tsuna fumbles. Somehow, they manage to fall onto Enma's spacious bed.

"You know, Enma-kun, you don't need to make excuses to get out of group stuff," Tsuna offers lamely, unable to look at Enma anymore. The redhead hums roughly, wincing at his dry throat.

"I didn't-didn't want to offend you but it was-was the only way to get _away_ ," Enma hiccups, curling into Tsuna's warmth. His cheeks feel sticky and there's probably _a lot_ of snot on Tsuna's shirt but neither teen cares. Tsuna begins stroking his hair again and Enma coos.

"I wish I'd known earlier," Tsuna tells him, horror coloring his tone. "I could have prevented…." Enma shrugs.

"I have anxiety attacks all the time. I'm used to it," he says nonchalantly. "This one...has been building up for a while." Tsuna bites his tongue and lays his chin on Enma's head. Enma's eyes slide shut and a yawn escapes.

"Do you want me to stay?" Tsuna's voice is very, _very_ quiet. Enma's heart pounds as he suddenly realizes the position that he's in. His throat closes and he can't speak, so he settles for a nod. Tsuna hums and rearranges the two into a more comfortable position. Since they're around the same height, it's tough for them to properly... _cuddle_. Enma slides down a bit, his knees knocking into Tsuna's shins, and he curls into the Decimo's warmth.

(He's conscious long enough to feel the press of lips against his forehead. It doesn't help his heart settle down.)

 _Enma may be invisible but Tsuna is the Sky and sees all and accepts his Earth with open arms and an open heart._

* * *

Have this, I'm trash. At first, Enma was gonna angst about his dead fam but then it devolved into anxiety! Fun times! I just wanted 0027 cuddles. And actually, Tsuna was gonna confront Enma but then I was like..."That's not _Tsuna_ , he's a good kid."


End file.
